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Starting with Season Six, Sam continues to leap --
putting things right that once were wrong and hoping
each time that his next leap will be the leap home....

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View Poll Results: What is your opinion of this story?
5 ? This is an excellent episode! One of my personal favorites! 3 42.86%
4 ? This episode was great! I will definitely tell others about it. 4 57.14%
3 ? This episode was good. It was worth reading. 0 0%
2 ? This episode was like the neutral zone ? I am indifferent. 0 0%
1 ? Bellisario would be rolling in his grave if he had one. 0 0%
Voters: 7. You may not vote on this poll

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Old 02-19-2006, 12:44 AM   #1
Dman176
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Default 1221 To Help a Friend

To Help a Friend
December 30, 1999


Berlin, Connecticut


During one of Sam?s most arduous leaps to date, Al is forced to take a more hands-on approach to right this wrong.


Written by: Tom Nicklis


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Old 02-19-2006, 12:46 AM   #2
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Default Re: 1221 To Help a Friend

Our rating system this season consists of six raters and three back-up raters! We took the average of six raters and came up with an average for that episode. Based on ratings of 10 being the highest and 1 being the lowest, the average of this episode was: 8.75

Please be aware that some reviews may contain spoilers! Some of the comments given were:

Seeker said:
?To Help a Friend? is well-plotted, well-written and the storyline definitely kept me wondering how both Al and Sam were going to come through this leap alive. However, I did have a problem with the dialogue. It?s not that the dialogue was unbelievable, it was believable and very real. But for all of that, when emotions, especially the deeply-felt, intense emotions of fear, loss or grief, were ?front and center? in a scene, more often than not, for this rater, the problem with the dialogue was that it had a distinctly wooden delivery. I read the dialogue and understood it, but I didn?t ?feel? it, I couldn?t ?hear? it. For me, both of those elements are equally as vital and important to a story as the characters, plotting, the storyline and the writing itself. That being said, all in all, however, this was a good, solid first outing for you, Tom. I look forward to your next story.

RATING: 8.5

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Morris J. Finkle said:
What a great way to kick off what seems to be yet another soon-to-be-classic "mini-arc" in the Quantum Leap mythos. So many writers have taken Sam to hell and back, but Tom stepped up to the plate and actually did the unthinkable. He gets points just for that alone.

I loved the subplot involving Y2K and Ziggy feeling "offended" that the Project had taken precautions to make sure she wouldn't crash like a "common household computer." Priceless QL moment that would have surely been addressed in the TV series had it continued, if not for mere comic relief.

The scene between Al and the Bartender was intriguing as well. Clearly, there's more going on than we've seen so far, and it will be interesting to see how this will all play out. And, I had always wondered about Al's prior leap during the whole Project Liberty storyline, so it was cool to see this loose end being tied up and resolved. It got slightly confusing toward the very end, but I got the general idea of what was going on.

So, the only question left now is: how is Al ever gonna get back home, and who will be his and Sam's observer until then? Next week can't come soon enough for me!

Well done, Tom!

RATING: 9.5

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Sporty said:
I just had to give this episode a 10. I love when Al leaps as well. And them being able to hug. Very sweet. I was confused on one thing, though. Is Al leaping now as well? From the leap-in to the next episode, it looks like he did. He is not back at the complex, just a thought. A great story, and one of my favorites! Great job!

RATING: 10

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Ziggy's Soul said:
This was a really neat story and a great debut for another new TVS writer.

The story had some definite twists and turns that were not expected. The dialogue did need a bit of work but overall it was very well done and had an edge to it that kept me interested throughout the story. The explanation of how the leaps were taking place was excellent. I like the hint that someone may be coming up in the future that we have to watch for.

Overall, great start and I look forward to reading more of this author's work.

RATING: 8.5

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Vince Beckett said:
This is very interesting. I like seeing Sam and Al leap together. It looks like they're leaping together for the next leap.

RATING: 9.5

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Gooshie said:
The plot idea of this story was very interesting, particularly the insight into Al's leaping and the fact that Sam and Al are now leaping together. Some scenes seemed "recycled," such as Al first meeting Nate in the Waiting Room and Donna asking Sam not to leave.

The leap at the bank had a lot of potential, but I was disappointed by the lack of description. It read very much like a script and didn't give me a very good feel for the atmosphere at all. I think this was a major downside to this episode.

In any event I am definitely looking forward to your next episode, Tom.

RATING: 6.5

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Now, it's your opportunity to rate this particular story. Let the author(s) know how you rate this story. If you'd like to give feedback, please go ahead and leave a reply!

Thanks!
The Virtual Seasons Team
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Old 03-04-2006, 02:40 AM   #3
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I loved it! I may not have read a lot of the VS stories yet, but I have read PLENTY of ones on fanfiction.net and other sites, and this is my favorite. I laughed, and screamed at the appropriate times, and just thoroughly enjoyed it. I cannot wait til next week!

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Old 03-05-2006, 08:35 AM   #4
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I want to say thank-you to those who have already reviewed. I am Glad you enjoyed it
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Old 03-08-2006, 09:53 AM   #5
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I always look forward to reading people feedback on my stories, Both positive and negative. I take that feedback, put it into my writing and try to use it to become a better writer. For instance:

Quote:
Seeker Said: However, I did have a problem with the dialog. It?s not that the dialog was unbelievable, it was believable and very real. But for all of that, when emotions, especially the deeply-felt, intense emotions of fear, loss or grief, were ?front and center? in a scene, more often than not, for this rater, the problem with the dialog was that it had a distinctly wooden delivery. I read the dialog and understood it, but I didn?t ?feel? it, I couldn?t ?hear? it.



I reread the story and was able to see it somewhat for myself. Then I asked a couple people their thoughts, and they said they could see it as well. So, Now I know that it is an area to work on before my next outing.

That being said, I would like to comment about something that Gooshie said;


Quote:
Some scenes seemed "recycled," such as Al first meeting Nate in the Waiting Room and Donna asking Sam not to leave.
Quote:



The Waiting Room Scene, I got that feeling even as I wrote it, but it needed to be there. That is a big part why there aren't any Waiting Room Scenes in the final 2 stories of my Mini-Arc.


However, I have to disagree With what you wrote about Donna asking Sam not to go. First off, she was at the project, so I couldn't very well keep her out of the control room after finding out her husband just leaped back. Then five minutes after he leaps back, he has to leap again. How exactly is she supposed to act, indifferently?


Sam: "Lofty, fire up the Accelerator. I'm leaping."
Donna: "Hey, bye Sam, I'll see you soon.


It just wouldn't work. Especially for a woman that has not seen her husband in like a year. And has only seen him like 7 or 8 times in the last 10 years. Of course she is going to tell him not to go.


As far as the description working in the Credit Union. I worked in a Credit Union for 3 1/2 years, and that is basically how it was in the one I worked in. A LOT of downtime. They actually just had to open it up to the community to get more members.


Most of the transactions I did were Deposits with/without cash back, withdrawls, and cashing checks. I feel it would have become monotonous to describe Sam doing those transactions and would have taken away from the story


All that being said, I would like to thank all the raters again for the feedback. I do appreciate it and will use it to hopefully make myself a better writer. I look forward to getting your reviews on my next two stories, The Great Blue Yonder and Alcatraz.
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Old 03-08-2006, 08:35 PM   #6
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The content of this story was terrific. The delivery....it needed to be fleshed out a bit as regarding descriptions and breaking up the constant flow of dialogue. I loved the ending and look forward to the next part.
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Old 03-23-2006, 04:20 PM   #7
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Default First Foray

First of all I'd like to welcome Tom to the Writer's Guild.
It is always good to bring in new blood.

Since I'm playing catchup again, most comments have already been made, but I'd like to add my ten cents on this being a very promising inaugural opus. Yes it may have needed a little polishing, but the basic elements were there in bucket loads.
Oh, and I too loved the Y2k bit. I touched on the millenium in one of my stories, and can't believe I passed up a chance like this. It is sooooo Ziggy!

Kudos Tom, I'm eagerly looking forward to the sequel, which has to be a good sign. Sometimes it is an advantage to be a couple of weeks behind, because you don't have to wait for the next episode!
Now if I can just find a quiet half hour....
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Old 03-23-2006, 08:48 PM   #8
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Thanks Helen. I am glad you enjoyed it. That Y2K bit and updating Ziggy, it was just way too good to pass up. I just know that Ziggy would act just like that and it was a lot of fun to write.

Being that all 3v stories were submitted a while ago, the next 2 have some of the same styalistic issues as the first one. but just wait till my next one.

I hope you enjoy the rest of the stories
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