confidence advice, please !!

jassian

Hopeful Maker of Art out of Daydream Dust
Oct 15, 2008
929
12
18
Germany
Hello lovely Leapers! :)

I got a big and exciting event coming up and am calling in all my friends for moral support. Because I am terrified, mystified, mortified, petrified *L* and a lot of other 'fieds'. And I find myself procrastinating and holding back a lot. Being confident (and I sure have a long way to go :)) and giving everything you got is the most important thing here. I mean I do believe in myself, I know somewhere deep inside that I can do it, at the same time a part of me doesn't want to let go of the safety of my life as it is now. It's probably some sort of fear of failure, but it feels like fear of succeeding. It's like I'm manipulating myself, not preparing well, holding back, mumbling on stage, that sort of thing.

Any advice would be worth a lot, so please send it my way.

In about two weeks several Australian casting agents will come to our uni and we're doing our 'showcase'. Which means doing a scene or a monologe, in my case a scene. And if they like you and what you're doing they might sign you and you might start getting work and so on.
So yeah, it's big. I'm not worried about doing a good job in general, I'm working really well with my scene partner and we'll be completely there for each other, so nothing can technically go 'wrong'. But I'm afraid that I will hold back some of what I can do or become really wooden at times, just because I don't feel ready for what would happen if things go really well.

Any thoughts?
 
Wow... I've never been in this situation, so I don't know if I can help. The first thing that comes to my mind is to try to forget the casting agent is there. Forget the consequences, forget the future, just be there in the moment and throw yourself into doing your scene as though it was your real life.

And break a leg! :)
 
I don't know how much this will help, but among my load of classes, one happens to be public speaking. One trick I use is this. "What's the worst that could go wrong?" I know what your initial reaction will be: you would lose your opportunity. But, will the people be coming back? If they don't choose you, will anything really change? I know how pessimistic I sound, but the best thing you can do for yourself not to set too high of hopes. Of course, in your situation, it would be the reverse. The best advice I could give you is this: do the best you can, and worry about it later. After all, if you do really well, and you find out you don't want to sign on with the agents, you can always refuse, right?

However, your nervousness is quite warranted. We were watching a video in that class, and in it, Jerry Seinfeld was saying about how nervous he still gets before his performances, even after his television show (if you don't know who Jerry Seinfeld is, he's a very well-known American comedian). I myself get nervous, right up until the moment I give my first word.

As for your screen partner, I have no more advice than to talk to him. Tell him why your nervous. I'm assuming you know him really well, but you can still explain your nervousness, and you know what? I'm sure he's feeling a lot of what you are. People have told me that I look very calm before a speech, when in truth I feel like I've drank a gallon of a caffinated drink. Looks can be deceiving.

I hope something in there helped. :)
 
Thaaaaanks guys!! :hurray:


Snish, you're spot on, mate. :D
Easy to forget, but so true!

i think i feel I'll probably need another year or so before I'm really ready to work. There's still a couple of hickups, like my voice going nuts when I'm not 100% clear on what I'm doing or me drifting out of the moment.
So yeah, maybe the worst thing is they hire me for something and then it turns out I'm not up to it.

I got to see my showreel (the recorded thing for agents) today. It actually had a few good moments, but it was very wooden at the start, the character tension tensed me up, I ended up rushing some things... At times I was clearly pushing for the emotion or rather held on to my emotional 'triggers' too much (that makes it look fake) although some other things came out of the moment, which is good. All in all I'm not really happy, I really need to relax soooo much more.

I just listen to some music to calm me down normally.

sounds good, I'll give that a go, thanks!

Also if I'm performing I tend to analyse they way others do things first.

Please explain :)

Me and my scene partner are cool, we're so close we're practically siblings. He's up to date with me being jittery and is simply 100% convinced we're gonna rock. He sure does! And he says it's because what I'm doing really works for him, so there's one good thing. :)
 
I'm a great believer in "Que Sera Sera" (Odd for a QL fan maybe but still).

I went for job once purely because I needed to earn more. I was happy in the job I had and didn't want to move.

Then I got to the interview, and decided I really did want the new job after all.
But I didn't think I stood a chance of actually getting it, especially after the interview when we were told we'd hear by 4pm and it got to five and I'd heard nothing.
So I started telling myself I didn't really want it after all, and trying to think of the negatives associated with it - longer hours etc.
By the time the offer came through, I'd convinced myself I DIDN'T want it, and nearly turned it down.
They then asked me what it would take to convince me to say yes! That really made me feel wanted, and I was able to negotiate a better deal on my contract.

So just go in there and do your thing, and tell yourself that whichever way it goes is for the best.
If it turns out you get into something you aren't really ready for, it'll be a learning experience, and may prove valuable years from now.
If you don't go further with it now, then who's to say a better chance won't come along later, when you are ready to make the most of it?
 
Thanks Errowyn!

leaper1 said:
So just go in there and do your thing, and tell yourself that whichever way it goes is for the best.
If it turns out you get into something you aren't really ready for, it'll be a learning experience, and may prove valuable years from now.
If you don't go further with it now, then who's to say a better chance won't come along later, when you are ready to make the most of it?

Thank you! :)
You're right, it's harder to make brave choices when you're happy in your current situation. Uhum. I'm glad to hear you went for your opportunity in the end.

Hmmm.
Yeah I guess it's one of those things you're never really ready for.
I'm used to seeing this as something far away in the future, now it's suddenly right here. Ready ? No way.
Then again, I actually do know what I'm doing. I obviously still got lots to learn, but I know what I'm doing right now if I'm really honest.

Yeah, my thing, that's important too, not someone elses. My thing flaws and all. 'Hickups' included if it so happens ;)

Yep, I think I'm back on target.

*sends out hugs to everyone*
This was really great advice guys, thanks again.

:D
 
Can I tell you how I feel about nerves?

Currently one of my jobs is an extra.

I will hope this will get me into acting in America. Serious.

Nerves are normal. You wouldn't be if you dudn't feel them.

But I only have one life. And no way will I waste it getting nervous on what I really want to do in life - entertain.

If nervous got the better of me - I'd miss out on this.

No no no.

Go for it!

:)
 
Jassian, I had one more idea. Have a good laugh before you go out to do your scene. Laughing is relaxing, raises your energy level, and increases your confidence. (I noticed it once--I sing in a chorus, and the conductor said something funny, cracking all of us up. We started singing, and my voice was twice as strong and the pitch was dead on. I mean, it startled me. Also the singer standing next to me. :) )

Of course, you can't arrange a spontaneous laugh in advance! :hmm Maybe your scene partner could tell you a joke you've never heard before.
 
Cool, thanks!

I'm actually capable of breaking into real laughter in a matter of seconds (that's because there's always something funny. In case of doubt that I'm trying so hard to laugh and just can't :) always cracks me up)

Sounds good, I do normally hop and shake around in a silly way and make even sillier noises, which helps a lot too.

That's all gonna be harder though with needing to be quiet backstage, it's set up with really tight entries & exits and the space we're doing it in is really small... I'll put some laughing into my warm up though, that's actually awesome. I shall recomend this to everyone else too.

Whhhhhhheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeehhhh !
Which brings me to the other thing that I've decided to really have fun with it. :roflmao:
So I'm with you there Angvav.
 
Oh I believe you, believe me I believe you, can you believe it? ;) I believe so.

I'm pretty sure I know what you mean: following your heart or your dream even when it's difficult and you have to leave a lot behind. Including your sense of safety. Done that, several times. This time I'm so happy with my life though that it became harder to see the dream.

My dream is to share myself, my life, my energy, my dreams, my stories, all that and to really touch people. I really want to stirr something true in them in many different ways, maybe make them see something about themselves or life or just feel. hm. yep. That's probably what every artists wants. It's so cool when someone approaches you and you find out they really felt something because of you , isn't it?

And of course being in a scene that really-really works is the greatest thing ever. Walking just on the edge between immediate truth and imagination and being so alive with your scene partner(s) that the moment becomes more real than life. Awesome. Yup, there are few better things.

And now this can potentially become what I do. I guess that'll always be a slightly overwhelming thought. :)