The Wedding Leaper

Sam Beckett Fan

Re-Writing Life
Jun 3, 2005
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ok, so a lot of you may remember me discussing this in the chat room last night (1-16-06). I was advised by a friend and tempted by a great story to Leap Sam into the movie The Wedding Singer starring Adam Sandler. don't worry i will still be working on Tale Of Three Sams, but my schedule is well on its way to filling up with college as you all probably know.

Warning: if you have not seen the movie, it is advised that you do NOT read this story as i have sat down with the film in front of me and wrote it line for line, with the exception of a few line changes to fit Sam's personailty and situations better. so basically it's one giant spoiler.

anyway here is the first portion, let me know of your thoughts.

The scene blurred slowly into view. He was standing in a large room populated by a whole lot of people. He was wearing a blue tux jacket and black dress pants. There was a person on stage singing a song really poorly in his opinion. It was a very strange looking person, he could not tell whether or not they were male or female, but he supposed that didn?t much matter.
?Hey nice save wedding singer,? A woman complimented in his direction.
?Yeah good job,? a man agreed. Wedding singer, He was a wedding singer? That was a new one, and at least he knew he could sing, but evidently he didn?t need to right now because the strange person without a gender was in the spotlight at the moment, a dim spotlight maybe. So this was a wedding, no wonder there were so many people and all dressed nicely. He wondered which of them the newlyweds were so he could congratulate them. Obviously that wasn?t hard; the bride was the one in long white dress and the groom in the seat next to her in the black tux. They were both in big pink chairs in the middle of the room. He walked up to them casually.
?Ah, I just wanted to say congratulations,? he said with that famous smile of his.
?Thank you,? the bride said with a smile, nodding her head.
?Thanks wedding singer,? the groom responded.
?Hey Robbie,? a man with blonde hair and a mustache called. It took him a second to figure out that the man was beckoning him. He walked over to the back table were bar was and joined the man.
?Hey Rob, nice save there on stage?you know I would be out with my limo, but we just got a new waitress, boy is she in trouble, boy is she going to get it, she doesn?t even know it. and I?m going to be the one to give it to her,? the man said, as he looked in the direction of a young woman with short blonde hair and blue eyes, and wearing purple eye shadow. She holding a large circular tray full of plates that she was handing out. He understood only because it happened to be a perfect Al comment.
?Now wait a second, you don?t even know her, who is she?? he asked.
?She?s holly Sullivan?s cousin. She?s half as easy as Holly, and I?ll have this deal by the end of the week,? the man continued. Sam Beckett was shocked by this comment but was distracted when the young waitress accidentally bonked a man on the head with the serving tray and an expression of embarrassment painted her face as she grabbed the tray before it toppled off her hand. Sam almost wanted to run over and offer his help but wanted to take care of his companion first.
?Excuse me, that?s very wrong to talk about a young lady that way, and it?s her first day,? he tried.
?Please, she couldn?t date anyone at work, so who?s left, hehe,? the man chuckled.
?What are you some kind of Fonzie clone?? Sam shot.
?Yes I am,? the man answered. Sam sipped on a glass of wine and walked away.
He casually wondered outside and saw a young man with curly brown hair and a purple and black dotted dress shirt, holding his stomach and a glass of wine. The kid looked too young to be drinking. Sam walked up to him.
?You ok, are you going to throw up?? he asked. The kid nodded.
?Ok come with me?umm?? he struggled as he took the glass from him and put an arm around him to help him along. Luckily it only took a few minutes or so to find a dumpster outside in the back. And he took the kid out and helped him lean over the side of the dumpster. Sam rubbed his back as he started hacking. He then noticed the blonde waitress the man inside was talking about hitting on, sitting on the steps next to them.
?Is he a friend of yours?? she asked, referring to the kid that was hacking.
?Oh ah, no I was just helping him out, so he wouldn?t have to get sick in front of all those people,? Sam answered.
?Well I?m glad I got to see it,? She replied with a smile. Sam chuckled, and then turned back to the kid.
?Ok, are you all done?? he asked.
?Yeah,? the kid responded.
?So are you going to wait awhile before you drink again then?? he asked. The kid nodded.
?Ok good,? Sam replied and gave the kid a pat on the back as he walked back inside. He turned back to the waitress and noticed a wine glass sitting next to her.
?So is that your first drink tonight?? he asked her.
?Oh,? she said glancing at her glass,? no, I?m not a drinker, it?s a Coca Cola.?
?Oh, well good,? Sam replied.
?You must be the wedding singer??
?Oh yeah, I?m ah?? what did the Fonzie clone inside call him again? ?Robbie, I?m Robbie.?
?I?m Julia,? she replied. ?I?m actually waitressing at your wedding next week?
Oh boy, I?m supposed to be getting married next week!
?That?s a very nice ring you have there,? Sam commented noticing a ring on her left ring finger, ?Are you getting married too?? she looked down sadly.
?Actually I don?t know how serious the guy is, who gave this to me,? she said sadly looking at the ring, ?Right now I feel like I?m doomed to wonder the planet alone forever.? Sam sat down next to her.
?No you?re not, I?m sure your fianc? is great guy and that you?ll be very happy with him,? he tried to assure her.
?I hope you?re right,? she replied.
?Well when is your wedding??
?I don?t know, he hasn?t set a date yet,? she replied, ?That?s why I am unsure of how serious he is.?
?Don?t worry, I?m sure he?ll decide soon, and you?re going to be very happy,? he told her with a smile. She returned it. Then the Fonzie clone appeared at the door.
?Hey, you better get in here, they?re starting to turn on George, you know he really needs to learn a new song,? he told him. From inside Sam could hear people booing and shouting, one man shouted ?You Suck!? Sam got up and headed up to the door.
?Well it was nice meeting you,? he told Julia.
?It was nice meeting you too, and if I ever do get married, maybe you?ll sing at my wedding,? she said.
?I?d love to,? Sam replied sweetly and walked inside, after shaking her hand. George, the genderless person who sung very poorly? Did that mean he was a man?
After saving the show with a few good numbers, the night finally ended and he was supposed to be hitching a ride home with the Fonzie Clone in his limo. First, however, he helped a little with the cleaning up. He was gathering up some decorations when the sound of the imaging chamber door filled his ears, and he turned to see Al step through.
?Where have you been?? was Sam?s first comment, in a soft tone.
?Oh, ah sorry Sam, I was here a little earlier, but you were off somewhere helping some kid with the pukies and I was enjoying the show,? Al answered.
?You were enjoying the show, with that bad singer who I can?t even tell was man or a woman?? Sam hissed.
?No way not him or her, or whatever, the waitresses and the single female guests,? Al replied lustfully. Sam frowned.
?Great, you know what; you would get along great with Mr. Fonzie over there!? Sam commented pointing towards the man with the blonde hair and mustache, who was now talking to another waitress with longer, blonde frizzy hair. He could only guess it was Holly, Julia?s cousin.
?Oh, that?s ah, Sammy, he?s your buddy, or Robbie?s Buddy, he drives a wedding limo,? Al confirmed looking at the handlink.
?So who is Robbie?? Sam asked.
?Oh Ah,? Al started with a mumble as he pressed a button on the handlink.
?Your name is Robbie Hart, you?re a wedding. Wedding?? he slammed the side of the handlink with his palm, the little gadget blinked in protest.
?Singer, oh wedding singer, you?re a wedding singer,? he confirmed.
?Yeah I know that much Al,? Sam replied. ?What year is this, it?s somewhere in the 80?s isn?t it??
?Ah yeah, it?s 1985,? Al replied.
?Thought so, I could tell by the songs,? Sam replied, ?So what am I here to do??
?Ah, we don?t know yet, Ziggy is still searching the original history,? Al replied.
?Well I need to know fast, because I?m, I mean Robbie is supposed to be getting married next week, and I can?t get married!? Sam panicked.
?Don?t worry, you may not have to be here that long, just hang in there ok, just focus on getting some sleep tonight? Al assured him.
?Yeah good idea, I am pretty tired? Sam replied.
?Don?t worry we?ll have the information as soon as possible,? Al told him and summoned the imaging chamber door, and disappeared through it.
 
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When Sam got home or Robbie?s home he found out that he lived in his sister?s basement and had two nephews, Peter and his older brother Tim. He got some sleep, thinking about Robbie?s own wedding hoping for Al to show up and tell him what he was there to do so he could do it and leap before Robbie?s wedding. Of course, one day? Fat chance! He gulped.

The next day he found out that he was suppose to give singing lessons to an old woman named Rosie at three. He wondered why an old woman would want to learn how to sing but he soon found out.

?There was love, all around, but I never heard it singing. No, I never heard it at all, Til? there was you.? Rosie sang very nicely as he played the piano.

?That was very nice Rosie; you?re going to blow everyone away at your fiftieth wedding anniversary?, Sam complimented with a smile.

?If I sing to Frank without making any mistakes, he?ll know how hard I worked and how much I still love him after all these years,? Rosie said pleasantly. Sam smiled.

?Oh and I just know that you and Linda are going to be very happy for many years to come as well,? Rosie continued. Linda that must have been Robbie?s fianc?. Sam just nodded and smiled nervously.

?Trust me it?s in your blood, it runs in your family. You are a born romantic just like your father. I know they?ll be looking down on you tomorrow,? Rosie said. Looking down on me, what exactly did that mean? Sam tried to hold back a gulp.

?Are you nervous?? Rosie must have noticed.

?Oh a little, I mean it?s a wedding,? Sam replied.

?Oh I don?t mean the wedding I mean the wedding night, will this be your first time with intercourse?? she asked. Sam cocked his eyebrows.

?I ah??

?Oh it?s nothing to be ashamed of, I wasn?t a virgin when I got married, I had already had intercourse with eight men,? Rosie told him. Sam gulped and turned as he lipped Oh boy!

?Ooh, I like this woman,? Said a voice behind him and he saw from the corner of his eye, Al standing next to a chair near the piano.

?Ah, I don?t think I needed to know that,? Sam said.

?Well that was a lot back then, it would be like two hundred today,? She finished.

?You know she?s right Sam,? Al said in the background.

?Umm, you know it?s almost five,? Sam said looking at his watch, I had better go.?

?Oh but your payment,? Rosie said getting up.

?Oh ah, right my payment,? Sam said.

?Oh you?re such a sweet boy, letting an old woman pay you in meatballs,? Rosie said. Meatballs, that was an interesting payment, but hey it was better than nothing.

?Ooh meatballs, yumola!? Al said, as Rosie disappeared into the kitchen.

?Oh boy, I think this is your leap Al,? Sam said quietly. Al puffed his cigar.

?Yeah, I love this leap, a lot of interesting chat topics,? Al said cocking his eyebrows.

?Do you know what I?m here to do yet?? Sam asked.

?Ah no not yet, I just wanted to see how you were doing and if you were with anymore beautiful women. But, ah, Rosie there, hehe she?s quite a catch huh?? Al replied. Sam frowned.

?Well what did Rosie mean when she said that Robbie?s parents would be looking down on him tomorrow?? Sam asked.

?Oh, they died when he ten, no data,? Al answered.

?Oh, I?m all out of Tupperware,? Rosie said as she emerged from the kitchen with two meatballs in her hands.

?Oh ah, that?s alright,? Sam said.

?Here,? she said and set the meatballs in Sam?s hands. Sam smiled nervously.

?Now go on take a bite, that?s my favorite part, watching you enjoy,? she said. So Sam nervously held a meatball up and took a bite, with Al looking over his shoulder, his tongue hanging out as he watched the meatball tear between Sam?s teeth.

?Mmm, this is great,? he said.

?Now can I have a bite, pretty please Sam, my mouth is watering,? Al pleaded. Sam ignored him.

?Now you listen to me Robbie Hart, you are going to make a great husband,? Rosie said happily.

?Well I hope so thank you,? Sam replied, and was shocked to fins that the words were true. Sam really did hope he would make a great husband someday, if he ever got home that is.



The next day, Sam just wanted to crawl in a closet and hide. It was the day Robbie was supposed to get married. Only now it wasn?t going to be Robbie standing up at that alter it was going to be Sam Beckett, and he just couldn?t do that, it was wrong.

?Al! I can?t get married! I can?t!? he moaned later that day as everyone filed into their seats and Sam stood in the back behind the seats.

?Oh don?t worry Sam, you don?t have to,? Al replied looking at the handlink.

?I don?t?? Sam asked a little surprised by this answer.

?No, according to Ziggy, the woman you?re suppose to marry, Linda, doesn?t show,? Al replied. Sam may not have wanted to get wrongfully married, but he certainly did not want this answer either. In fact it made his spine crawl as if a large insect walked across his back. He took in a deep breath accompanied by a frown.

?Sam are you ok?? Al asked.

?Are you sure she doesn?t show?? he asked.

?Yeah, I?m sure,? Al confirmed. ?Are you ok??

?Yeah, yeah I?m fine, I don?t know why but for some reason my stomach isn?t feeling good all of a sudden,? Sam replied placing a hand on his stomach.

?Will you be alright, you?re not gonna throw up?? Al asked concerned.

?No, I?ll be fine, thanks Al,? Sam replied.



Sam stood at the alter, a few hours later, his stomach churning as he waited for his bride whom he already knew was fated not to show. He stood once again alone at the center of attention, waiting for the beautiful moment that wasn?t going to happen. He waited to see her come walking down the aisle in her beautiful white dress with her beautiful smile that always magnetized Sam?s lips. He wasn?t sure what was happening, but he felt like he was waiting for something else. Almost like he had been here before. He tried to keep a strait face as to not hint to anyone that he knew that he was going to have to send them all home.

?Maybe we should call her?? the priest waiting to host the ceremony suggested. Sam didn?t know what to reply.

?Maybe she?s still doing her makeup,? he dumbly said, his mind was somewhere else. His hair blew in the cool breeze as he looked out to the aisle still somehow determined to wait. His heard ached with every beat, he was sure he had been here before. Robbie?s sister than approached him.

?Hi ah, sis,? he said softly.

?Hi Robs,? she said back, taking his hands. ?I ah, just got off the phone with Linda?s mom and Linda?s not there, but there was a note.?

?A note?? Sam asked. ?Is everything ok??

?Yeah she?s fine, it basically indicated that Linda was not coming today,? His sister told him gently.

?Donna?s not coming!? Sam asked sadly, the name kind of just escaped him from thin air.

?Donna??

?Ah, Linda, did she say why?? Sam asked. His sister shook her head.

?I am so sorry honey,? she said.

?Oh it?s ok,? Sam meekly answered.

?Do you want me to say something?? she asked.

?No, it?s ok, I just need ah be alone for a minute, I?ll be right back,? Sam answered making his way down the aisle. He disappeared into a small red tent in the back, and immediately became face to face with Robbie.

?I?m so sorry,? he squeaked at the long dark haired man that had a tear rolling down his cheek in the mirror.

Donna. Donna Elesee, the most beautiful woman in the world, the love of his life. But he had stood alone at the alter as well, waiting to marry thin air. He remembered that night, he had cried in his mother?s arms, something he hadn?t done since he was a kid. He came out of the tent and went to a bush where no one could see, and got sick.



Later that same day, he was sitting at the kitchen table with Sammy and his brother-in-law, Andy. Billy Idol was singing ?White Wedding? on the TV screen. The boys ran by, Tim in a Freddy Krueger mask. The song stung.

?Can we please turn this crap off?? Sam asked bummed.

?That?s right Robbie, you have to let it out,? Andy responded.

?Let what out?? Sam asked.

?You?re feelings you know,? Sammy told him. ?About what that lousy ***** did to you today?.

?Don?t call her that,? Sam protested, as he finally though he knew why he was here. ?We?re going to get back together, you?ll see?. Tim came up to him in his Freddie Krueger mask.

?I made this for you Uncle Robbie,? he said handing Sam a large piece of paper.

?Oh thank you,? he said and looked at it. It was the picture of Robbie and Linda that sat outside and introduced the bride and groom. The little boy had given Linda devil features.

?Hey now, that?s not nice,? Sam said, and handed the picture back to him, and he took off. Sam got up from the table and left to go sit out on the front porch and be alone. He sighed as the cool breeze stung his cheeks and blew his hair back. Just then his peace was interrupted when a woman with brown frizzed like hair and layer of makeup appeared. Sam recognized her from the picture.

?What are you doing here, it?s a little late,? Sam greeted her.

?I?m sorry,? Linda said, paying with the ends of her hair. ?I just couldn?t do it?.

?Well if you need more time, I can wait,? Sam said remembering what he was here to do.

?No, I don?t need more time Robbie, I don?t ever wanna marry you,? Linda said.

?Oh Well you know it would have been much easier if I had known that yesterday,? Sam said.

?Well I?ve been talking to my friends the last couple of days, and I think I?ve figured out what?s been bothering me,? Linda said.

?Oh no,? Sam said.

?See, I?m not in love with Robbie now, I?m in love with Robbie six years ago. Robbie, the lead singer of Final Warning, I used to come and watch you from the front row, in your spandex pants and your silk shirt unbuttoned, licking the microphone like David Lee Roth,? Linda explained. Sam lifted an eyebrow.

?You can?t live in the past Linda,? Sam told her.

?I can?t help it, I woke up this morning and realized I?m about to marry a wedding singer,? Linda replied sounding a little irritated. ?I am never going to leave Ridgefield?.

?Well why do you need to leave Ridgefield? Why can?t we raise a family here?? Sam asked.

?Oh yeah, living in your sister?s basement with five kids, while you?re off six hours a day doing wedding gigs at $50 a pop!? Linda was now frustrated.

?Once again, information I could have used yesterday!? Sam snapped.

?The point is we grew apart a long time ago, you just wanted to get married so bad that you didn?t care to whom!? Linda accused. Sam?s jaw dropped, that had stung.

?That?s not true, I would never get married unless I knew it was the perfect woman, I would never take advantage of a woman!? Sam snapped back, more speaking for himself than Robbie.

?Come here,? he continued and she took one step up so that he could take her hand. Then the youngest boy, Peter came running out.

?Hey Linda, you?re a *****!? he said. Linda frowned uneasily. Sam looked at the small boy.

?Hey, where did you learn that kind of language? Go inside and wash your mouth out with soap!? he ordered.

?I gotta go,? she said as Peter ran back into the house, ?I?m sorry?. With that, she turned and walked away. Sam watched her leave.

?Donna!? he whispered.





Meanwhile, Julia Sullivan was listening happily to her music when someone reached an arm out from behind, holding flowers in her face and she turned with a shout of startle.

?Don?t be so jumpy,? A man told her, ?Here these are for you?

?Glenn! Oh thank you, their beautiful? She replied happily and gave him a hug. She then took the flowers, and walked with him to the middle of the room where had seated himself in a chair, while Julia stood in front of him.

?I have a surprise,? Glenn told her.

?A surprise?? She asked excitedly. He handed her two brochure packets and she looked at them, confused.

?Two air plane tickets to Las Vagas?? she asked.

?Da da da dum, da da da dum,? Glenn hummed the traditional Wedding song, ?Here Comes the Bride?. Julia brightened up.

?Oh my God Glenn, OH my God!? She said happily giving him a hug and then stepping back again.

?I know you wanted to set a date so I went to the travel agent and set it,? Said Glenn.

?Glenn I love you so much,? Julia said, ?But Las Vegas, I thought??

?Jules it?s the romance capital of the world,? Glenn cut her off before she could argue. ?I just don?t want a big wedding, I mean a bunch of people we don?t know who are just there for the all you can eat buffet, they might as well be in Las Vegas?.

?Ok,? Julia reluctantly answered, ?Then Las Vegas it is then?.

?Jules, are you going to do the girl thing, you know be really happy on the inside and all pouting on the inside?? Glenn asked with a sour face.

?No, I?m very happy,? Julia responded. Glenn was silent for a moment. He sighed.

?OK, let?s get married here,? he reluctantly decided. Julia lit up and hugged him again.

?Oh thank you Glenn!?

?It?s more important to you anyway?.

?I promise I?ll throw the best wedding, even you?ll have fun,? she told him.

?Mmm-hum,? Glenn mumbled.



Three days later, Sam Still didn?t get out of bed, he laid there bummed and feeling helpless and hopeless. If he didn?t get Robbie and Linda back together, he?d never leap. The problem was that was next to impossible, he was probably never going to see her again. This leap was screwed up. The door to his basement room opened but he ignored.

?Hey Robbie?? Sammy?s voice sounded behind him. Sam still did not turn, nor did he acknowledge.

?Robbie, you ok?? Sammy asked.

?Do I look ok?? Sam mumbled. He felt the bed jump as Sammy plopped down beside him.

?Hey these sheets are soft, you use Downey??

?Yeah sure, whatever,? Sam replied.

?Hey you have to get back to work, there are going to be like, a hundred drunk women at this wedding tomorrow,? Sammy told him.

?So, what do I care?? Sam asked.

?You need to move on with your life, find someone else,? Sammy told him.

?After I just lost out on a marriage I am suppose to just find someone else, after like what, five days??

?Yeah, well, don?t worry about marriage, I?m just talking about someone to play with your ding-dong,? Sammy said and got up. Sam seized his pillow and threw it at Sammy as he left.

?You know, he?s right Sam,? Al?s voice appeared as Sam sat up in bed.

?He?s right!? You?re saying you want me to find someone who?ll play with my??Sam shot at the hologram.

?No, not that, the other thing, about finding someone else, I?ve got some new information here Sam,? Al replied.

?I know Al, I?m here to get Linda and Robbie back together, but how am I supposed to do that, I?ll probably never see her again after the talk we had a few days ago,? Sam said.

?What? No, no, Sam, forget Linda, Ziggy says you?re here for Julia,? Al replied.

?Julia?? Sam was confused.

?Yeah you know, Julia Sullivan, the blonde waitress you met the day you leaped in?? Al reminded him.

?Yeah I remember her, why do I need to help her?? Sam asked.

?Well Ziggy says that you have to put Robbie together with Julia,? Al said. Sam stood up, surprised. Al cocked his eyebrows.

?You?re wearing a tank top shirt but no boxers?? Al asked.

?I couldn?t find any,? Sam replied. ?This room is a mess!?

?And how can I put Julia with Robbie, she?s already engaged,? he continued.

?Yeah I?m aware of that,? Al replied looking at the handlink, ?She?s engaged to marry one Glenn Gulia?.

?Julia Gulia?? Sam tried it and it was sour on his tongue.

?I know it sounds like the name of a smoothie at Orange Julius,? Al agreed.

?Ok so his name is a smoothie at Orange Julius, what else is wrong with him?? Sam asked.

?Well we?re not sure yet, we?re still looking into Julia?s Original history,? Al answered.

?Well what about Robbie?? Sam asked.

?Well Robbie has a fixation on Julia; he?s in love with her. But she married Mr. Orange Julius, But Robbie eventually turns out ok, never marries, but he?s is doing fine. It?s Julia Sam? Al answered.

?What about Julia, what happens to her?? Sam asked concerned.

[font=&quot] ?Ah, I?m sorry Sam, no data, I?ll have to go have Ziggy search some more, but don?t worry, I promise it won?t be long? Al said and exited the imaging chamber. Sam plopped back down on his bed. His head was in a tangle now, and he worried about Julia. She was in trouble somehow, and the only answer he could come up with was Glenn.[/font]
 
The Next morning when Sam woke up he was feeling a lot better. He still hurt thinking about Donna but he knew he had to move on for Robbie?s and especially for Julia?s sake. He remembered that he had another wedding gig that day so he got out of bed and got dressed. For some reason, however he still felt tired, and pretty bummed. He had a cup of coffee and drunkenly combed his hair.

?Holiday, Celebrate, holiday. If we took a holiday, took some time to celebrate, just one day out of life, it would be, it would be so nice?holiday?? Sam sang poorly and drunkenly on the stage that day in front of another wedding. He finished singing, with no applause to follow it, and then words started to pour from his mouth.

?Well, we?re all here today to celebrate Cindy and Scott, and well, Cindy showed up today so Scott you gotta be psyched already,? He said.

?Hey wedding singer I?m not paying you for your thoughts on life, I?m paying you to sing!? a man wearing a white suit at one of the front tables shouted at him. Sam looked his way.

?Well I have the microphone and you don?t, so you will listen to every word I have to say!? Sam shouted at him.

?You know, not all of us will find love, like well, me, and that fat guy over there,? he continued and pointed to a fat man eating at a front table.

?And that lady with the sideburns, and probably everyone at table nine. It?s funny because me, fatty, sideburns lady and the mutants at table nine, will never find a way to better the situation because apparently we have absolutely nothing to offer the opposite sex.?

?You are the worst wedding singer in the world buddy!? the man in the blue suit stood up and pointed an accusing finger at Sam.

?Sir one more outburst and I?m going to have to strangle you with my microphone wires!? Sam warned. The man?s wife took his arms and urged him to sit back down, but he gave into the urge with a frown towards Sam.

?Now let?s cut the stupid cake because I know fatty over there is going to have a heart attack if he doesn?t eat again soon!? Sam declared. The fat man looked at him insulted but then gave a shrug with an uneasy grin. ?And while we do that, here?s a little mood music?. The band began to play and Sam got into a drunken groove.

Cindy and Scott are newlyweds, well whoopidy doo! He loves her, but she loves this guy right here?? Sam begun to sing as he pointed to random people in the audience. ?and he loves somebody else, you just can?t win. And so it goes until the day you die!? he sung in the face of the newlyweds. Al had appeared and just watched with disgust from the sidelines.

?Sam, what the hell are you doing!? he shouted but of course Sam ignored.

?This thing they call love is gonna make you cry. I hate you. I?ve had the blues the reds and the pinks??

?Sam, what the?? Al?s jaw was hanging open and he held his arms out in confusion.

?One thing?s for sure?? Sam continued and then held the microphone out to the fat guy.

?Love stinks?? the fat man sang into the microphone uneasily.

?Love stinks!? Sam repeated, ?Yeah yeah?? he held the mike once again to the fat man.

"Sam, what's the matter with you, are you high or something!" Al shouted.

?Love Stinks!? he was enjoying himself this time.

?Love stinks!? Sam sang again, ?Yeah yeah?? this time he held out the mike for the sideburns lady.

?Love stinks?? she sang.

?Love stinks! Yeah yeah,? Sam then held the mike for the mutants at table nine.

?Love stinks,? they all sang.

?Love stinks, yeah yeah,? Sam sung again and then turned to end up right in the face of the man in the white suit, who punched him hard in the face and he went falling backwards into the table behind him. Sam shook his head. What the hell had just happened, what had he done? No time to think though, the man in the white suit grabbed him by the neck attempting to strangle him while other people joined in from behind. The fat man bit the leg of the man in the white suit and the table nine mutants fought for him as well. The next thing Sam knew, he was lying in a dumpster in the back, the same dumpster he had helped that young boy yak into. He was buried in garbage but he did not try to climb out. He decided that he had deserved what he got, what the hell had he done in there?

?Sam?? called a voice, ?Oh there you are, Sam what the hell happened in there, what were you doing!??

?I have no idea Al, I feel horrible, I ruined that nice couple?s wedding, I don?t know what came over me,? Sam said.

?Well don?t forget you also made a complete fool of yourself,? Al added in. Sam frowned.

?Oh gee thanks Al, can?t forget that!? Sam shot.

?Sorry, anyway, I know what came over you, Robbie came over you, you must have merged minds with him, see he was concerned about getting back to his time period for his wedding so I kinda had no choice but to tell him what happened with Linda and then I had to stop him from smashing things in the waiting room, he?s been in a breakdown ever since,? Al explained.

?Oh that?s just great, have you any good news to bear??

?Well yeah as a matter of fact that?s why I?m here; Ziggy came up with some more information on Julia?.

?That?s great, lay it on me?.

?Well she marries Mr. Orange Julius but it only lasts a couple of months, Glenn is a real nozzle Sam, Julia is just a possession to him, you have to make sure that she doesn?t marry him, and that she marries Robbie instead.

?Well when?s the wedding??

?Next week, August 6th?.

Julia then walked up looking over the side of the dumpster at him with concern.

?Hey?? she said worried.

?Oh, hey,? Sam greeted back. Al just stared.

?I was wondering what happened to you,? Julia said.

?Did everybody leave?? Sam asked.

?Pretty much, except for a few cops that are still interviewing witnesses,? Julia answered.

?K,? Sam mumbled and heaved himself up and Julia gave him a hand to help boost him out of the dumpster. ?I?m going to get out of here?.

?So it was your first wedding back,? Said Julia, ?Of course things are going to be a little shaky?.

?Shaky, I made a fool of myself in there, I don?t know what came over me to act like that,? Sam was deeply embarrassed for him and Robbie?s behavior and ruining a wonderful night for two innocent people.

?Well I still think you?re the best, you just had a rough night that?s all,? Julia answered. Sam cracked a smile.

?Glenn and I set the date, so now you have to sing at our wedding, next week on August the 6th,? Julia continued. Sam looked at her like he just wanted to burst out and hold her and tell her everything about how she was not suppose to marry Glenn.

?Julia, I sorry but I can?t, I wish I could but I?I just can?t,? he said, as he made his way away from the building.

?Well I?m having an engagement party this week and I really want you and Sammy to come,? She said as Sam was walking away. Sam ignored her and she watched him disappear with worry, then turned and went back inside.
 
The next night, Sam was scheduled to sit for Robbie?s two nephews. He walked up to the house after taking a long walk and his sister immediately opened the door.

?Oh good you?re here?.Robbie?s here, let?s go!? she greeted him, ?The kids have already eaten but if they get hungry there?s ice pops in the freezer, or they can have microwave popcorn?.

?Good,? Sam replied.

?So are you going to the engagement party tomorrow night?? she asked him.

?Yeah, I?ll be there,? Sam answered. She nodded and then ran back to the door.

?Come on Andy move your ass!? she shouted.

?Hang on I?m watching Dallas, I think J.R might be dead or something they shot him,? Andy answered from the inside.

?Good night,? the sister said and gave Sam a kiss which he returned. ?I love you?

?I love you,? Sam replied and went into the house.

?Hello??

?Hey Uncle Robbie?s here!? Tim said happily and he and his brother ran out to the hall to meet him. They ran at Sam with hugs.

?Whoa hey? Sam greeted with a chuckle.

?Is it true you?re having a nervous breakdown?? Tim asked.

?No,? Sam answered truthfully.

?Nervous breakdown, nervous breakdown!? Peter chanted.

?Who said that??

?Everyone?s been saying that,? Tim answered in a duh tone.

?Everybody, you?re eight years old you only know your parents, what are you talking about?? Sam asked.

?Is it true that you?re going to end up in a mental institution?? Tim asked ignoring Sam?s remark. Sam took a deep breath and shuttered at the two words.

?Cuckoo?s nest!? Peter chanted.

?No!? Sam snapped as a result of being struck hard by the thought of another mental institution.

?Hey kids,? Andy said as he entered the room, ?Shh, remember what we talked about? Go over there and watch your television?. The two boys obeyed, Sam was confused.

?Can I speak to your for a second Rob?? Andy asked him.

?Yeah,? Sam replied.

?You know I?ve been thinking about what happened to you, and I think it?s all for the best. I know you were in love and everything, but that wears off. See, me and your sister, we used to be wild. She was very adventurous, and we got into some crazy ****.?

I don?t wanna know. Sam thought.

?Now the thrill?s gone. If we get a second alone, we usually go to sleep. I mean if it?s a special occasion, she might do this exotic dance for me.? Andy continued. Sam listened with an expression of easiness.

?What??

?Sometimes she might work with my nipples a bit?. Ok, Sam had had enough now.

?Alright, enough, go out,? he said putting a hand up in surrender. ?I?ll take care of the kids?. He turned away.

?Yeah, I don?t know what I said, but I just said something,? Andy mumbled more to himself than to Sam and left.



The Next Night, Julia stood at the drinks table at her engagement party, her face lit up as she looked at Glenn and gave her a wave. She looked over gave Glenn a wave over in another section of the room talking to some other man.

?Women got a thing about marriage, if you want to stay with them, you?re going to have to marry them,? Glenn was saying to the man after he returned Julia?s wave. ?No big deal. There she is.? Julia approached them accompanied by her mother. Al gave Glenn a cold glare in response to his remark, nozzle!

?You Jerk!? he snapped in Glenn?s ear.

?The woman that put me into submission,? Glenn continued.

?That?s right,? she responded as playfully slugged him. ?August 5th is just a week away now; we?ve got a lot of planning to do?.

?Umm, do you think it would be better, if you took over all the arrangements?? Glenn replied.

?I?d like to do it together,? Julia replied.

?Yeah, but you like this stuff,? Glenn argued. ?It?s really not my thing?.

?Apparently neither is true love! I don?t believe this, Sam where the hell are you!?? Al commented.

?God forbid I screw up the wedding flowers, how could I live with myself?? Glenn continued. Al scoffed, he felt tenseness in his arms, it was the urge to punch Glenn, but instead he bit hard on his cigar to attempt to subside it.

?He?s gonna be so wasted that he won?t even know flowers are at the wedding,? the man that Glenn was talking to before cut in.

?I?m with him,? Al said feeling like he was really a part of this conversation.

?Oh yeah, up high,? Glenn said and he high-fived with the other man. Al ran a hand down his face.

?Hey Glenn, I hear you?re going to have your bachelor party Friday night before the wedding, gonna be alright with that? You might miss Miami Vice?? Asked Holly.

?Nope, summer, reruns, I?m all set,? Glenn replied.

?Great,? Holly replied and walked away.



The door opened and Sammy entered the house followed by Sam. Al sighed with relief.

?Alright, nice house,? Sammy commented. ?I told you this guy was loaded?. This must have been Glenn?s house, Sam guessed.

?Right, come on, let?s fine Julia,? Sam replied.

?Yeah sure, how?s my jacket?? Sammy asked.

?It looks fine, but the glove doesn?t go with it, too Michael Jackson?.

?That?s the point,? Sammy said as he stripped off the glove.

?Hey, there?s Julia,? Sam spotted her talking with the man that commented about Glenn being drunk at his wedding, and Glenn next to her turned the other way, talking to some woman in a small black dress and black tights.

?Well, let?s go say hello,? Sammy said, and Sam followed him, then was started when Al popped himself in next to him.

?Thank God you made it, you?re not gonna believe what I?ve been listening to,? Al told him.

?Is this important?? Sam whispered. Al?s eyes widened.

?You bet it is, I?ve been listening to Glenn chatting over here with this other guy and it?s worse than I thought Sam, he was saying behind Julia?s back that he?s only marrying her so she can?t get away from him. He doesn?t love her, woman are just cuddly stuffed animals to sleep with!? Al explained angrily. Sam made a tight fist at his side as he gave Glenn a furtive glare.

?Rob, you alright bud?? Sammy asked looking back at him.

?Yeah,? Sam growled under his breath and cleared hi throat to store it back away for later.

?Hi you guys, I?m so glad you came!? Julia greeted them, her face lit up at their appearance. Sam found it cute and it made him happy.

?Jason this is Robbie and Sammy,? she introduced them to the man she was talking to, ?and this is my fianc? Glenn?.

?Hey congratulations Glenn,? Sam said trying to hide his urge to punch him, as he shook his hand and tried not ?accidentally? flip him over.

?Robbie Hart, man I heard about what happened to you at your wedding that was so cold, you must feel like ****,? Jason commented.

?No actually I feel like skipping merrily through a field of daisies, thanks for bringing that up, you know my parents died when I was ten, want to talk about that?? Sam shot sarcastically, and then shook his head and blinked.

?Why would we wanna talk about that?? Jason asked.

?I don?t know,? Sam answered.

?Hey, I think somebody needs a drink,? Glenn said, pointing to Sam. Sam had his eyes on the arm Glenn had around Julia and he wanted to shout for him to get his hands off her!

?Actually I?m not a big drinker,? Sam said.

?Well I am, how about an Alabama Slammer,? Glenn replied.

?Sounds like a plan,? Jason answered.

?Meet me at the bar, I?ve gotta piss first,? Glenn said and walked away.

?Yeah, have a few drinks and then drive home,? Sam said with a sarcastic smile of approval. Jason looked at him and nodded confused. Then he walked away.

?Hey thanks for inviting us Julia,? Sam said.

?I?m glad you guys came, we hang out a work so much, but we don?t get to talk ?cause we?re always so busy,? Julia replied.

?Well we should make time to talk, don?t you think,? Sammy suggested slyly. Sam looked at him the same way he looked ay Al when he went off on a woman frenzie.

?That?s a great idea, lets talk,? Al agreed looking at Julia with puppy eyes.

?Al!? Sam whispered.

?You know, you should really learn to ignore me sometimes you?re constantly making yourself look like a loony tune? Al shot back, his eyes never left Julia. Julia smiled and nodded In response to Sammy?s suggestion.

?You know when he first saw you he said it was gonna hit on you,? Sam told her.

?Really?? she asked Sammy.

?That?s not true,? Sammy protested.

?What are you talking about, you told me she was in trouble that she was gonna get it and she didn?t even know it,? Sam reminded him.

?Of course she won?t even know it she can?t see me,? Al said.

?Not you!? Sam shot way, way under his breath so it was practically mere lips.

Julia gave Sammy a look of shock.

?He?s teasing I would never say that,? Sammy smiled.

?Come on you said you were gonna give it to her,? Sam told him.

?Give me what exactly?? Julia asked.

?Yeah?? Sam agreed.

?You?re a jerk,? Sammy smiled and walked away.

?What do you mean, it?s not your fault, you didn?t know she was engaged,? Sam tried to make amends.

?So now you?re not going to give it to me?? Julia giggled.

?Very funny,? Sammy shot and proceeded out. Sam and Julia laughed together as Sammy disappeared. He liked her laugh, it was smooth and cute.

?So how are you doing?? Julia asked.

?I?m doing better,? Sam replied. ?So how are you and Glenn doing with the wedding plans??

?Um, well, Glenn isn?t really into?he?s just really busy right now, he works at Wall Street you know how that is nowadays,? Julia replied.

?He wants her to do the whole thing herself!? Al chimed in response to her not giving the answer herself. Sam tried to roll his eyes furtively.

?Julia, are you sure that Glenn is really the one for you?? Sam asked.

?Sure he is, why?? Julia asked.

?Well he really doesn?t seem into this wedding,? Sam told her.

?I just told you he?s been very busy, I can?t really blame him,? Julia answered.

?Right Wall Street, stocks and stuff,? Sam replied.

?Bonds actually, and he really has barely any time to sleep let alone plan a wedding, so I?m kind of doing this on my own, but I went to Marshall?s for the floral centerpieces.? Julia told him.

?Actually you should go to Tony?s their cheaper and have a great selection,? Sam suggested out of nowhere.

?Alright, well thank you for the tip,? Julia responded with a smile. ?You I can?t wait till we get to hang out again at the next wedding?. This made Sam smile.

?Yeah me neither, and you know there are ton?s of other things to do besides weddings,? he said.




ok, this is so far all i have written, but be pacient the rest is on it's way.:angel