From: lalsoong@sprynet.com (Christine Wirick ) Newsgroups: alt.tv.quantum-leap.creative Subject: Paradox Delusion 06/23 Date: Sat, 22 Feb 1997 18:58:32 GMT Organization: Sprynet News Service Message-Id: <30ee8674.1088129@news.sprynet.com> Nntp-Posting-Host: ad70-113.compuserve.com Mime-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: text/plain; charset=us-ascii Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit Chapter Six: When Meg and Sam returned to the Sheffield home, they found Raymond in the living room with several of Patrick's snapshots laid out on the coffee table. "Meg knows the truth about who I am," Sam explained. Raymond nodded, not showing any surprise or demanding to know why Sam had confided in her. "I know these have nothing to do with this assignment," he said, turning back to the photographs, "but somehow they make me feel closer to Patrick." Meg walked over to the coffee table and sat down on the carpet across from Raymond. Looking through the pictures, she said, "As a child, I was always fascinated when looking through my Grandma's old photographs. She had ten children, so I had lots of cousins. I understand how you feel about your friend. When my Grandma died a couple of years ago, I found comfort in her pictures." Raymond looked at her. "Patrick is not dead." "No, of course not, and Sam and I are going to help you see that no harm comes to him." Reaching out and grasping Raymond's hand, she added, "You're not alone in this battle." She looked up at Sam, who had walked up beside her. He could see a fierce determination in Raymond's expression. That probably meant that Raymond was opting for a personal crusade against evil. Sam only hoped that the man wouldn't be so blinded by his anger and frustration that he forgot his original objective. "Al said that we should get back to you," Sam informed Raymond. "Patrick is just as worried about you as you are about him." Sam sat down in the chair kitty-corner to the couch. "I've made my decision. I want to do the right thing, ease Ben's pain; stop this paradox before Patrick or myself get killed. I'll try the Levels." "Levels?" Meg said, surprised. As if on cue, Al popped in by the stairway. He was puffing nervously at a cigar. Sam barely acknowledged the project observer before turning back to address Meg. "It's a psychic technique that will allow me to communicate directly with Patrick Marland." Meg nodded knowingly. "Yes, I use the technique sometimes to help me relax as well as transmit my thoughts and feelings to my psychic partner. I was just curious why you hadn't told me you were considering trying them." "Oh, I guess I should have realized that a lot of psychics would find the technique useful." "You won't regret this," Raymond replied. "Our odds of tearing Ben from the demon's clutches will increase greatly. Patrick will be so pleased. He's very anxious to meet you." "That's what I feel: a whole lot of anxiety." "We'll do this in your room, if you like, where you can lie down." Raymond glanced around the room, his gaze stopping right at the spot where Al stood. "I trust your friend is nearby?" "I'm right here," Al said, waving his cigar. He eyed Raymond eerily, obviously a little spooked that the man could sense where he was standing. "Yes," Sam replied. "Good," Raymond said and stood. "Then let's get started." He walked toward the stairs. "You don't mind, do you?" Sam asked Meg. "Of course not," she responded. "It's necessary if we want to succeed here. Besides, I can use the time to write up some notes. It's getting on toward my most productive hour. I'll see you at dinner." They ventured upstairs, parting in the hallway. Sam went inside his room to find Raymond and Al waiting for him. He removed his shoes before climbing onto the bed. He fluffed the pillow, laid his head upon it, and sighed as he closed his eyes. "I guess I'm ready," the time traveler said uneasily. "Okay, Sam, try to relax," Al said in an equally uneasy tone. Al studied the handlink as Ziggy sent data on Sam's biofeedback. Over a minute passed before Ziggy confirmed that Sam had entered Level One, followed by the slight movement of Sam's right index finger. After wiping his brow, Al said quietly, "Let yourself relax, feel your body floating into Level two." Slowly, Sam began drifting from one Level to the next, each subsequent Level taking a bit longer than the one before it. Sam grew noticeably tense as he began to enter into Level five. He felt anxious about talking with Patrick, and slipped back into Level four. Ostensibly calm, though he didn't feel it, Al coaxed Sam back through the transition, and Sam entered Level five again. "Hello Sam," a warm voice said. "I knew you could do this." "Patrick?" Sam questioned, his voice cracking. He felt like a schoolboy, eager, anxious, shy, all rolled up in an emotional bubble about to pop. He had never spoken, never even thought it possible, to a leap host before this leap--and now he was talking to the second host! "Yes, Sam. This is Patrick." Although, Patrick's voice was clear, Sam could not see the psychic. "Ah, Sam," this time it was Al calling him. "I can hear him, too--barely. Am I supposed to?" This surprised Sam and he had no answer to offer. So he waited for an explanation from Patrick. "It has to do with your brainwave attunement," the psychic said. "If both of you weren't closely attuned, you wouldn't be able to communicate from leap to leap, as you already know. Levels also works, because of this basic principle. Al can hear me now, because Sam, you are attuned between both of us. If you wish to go farther into Levels, where you could see me, Al would no longer be able to hear me." "I understand," Sam said. "So do I," Al said, "but a little warning about this attunement thing would have been nice." "Do you not welcome the opportunity to monitor this interaction at least a little ways into it?" "Well. . . .just warn me next time." "I am sorry, Al, for overlooking the possibility of this happening. You have to understand, however, that we're dealing with so many variables here that it's difficult to remember to consider each one. I know this mission is immensely different than any of your others, but I am confident in both of your ability. I wouldn't have agreed to your making the leap otherwise." "Agreed?" both Sam and Al questioned. "I don't understand how you know what's going on," Sam continued. "Relax, my friend. You will in time. If both of you agree, it would be easier for us to now continue at a higher Level." "Al?" Sam wished he could still see his friend, so he could read the observer's mood in his expression. "Go ahead, Sam. I'll still be here when you get back." "Allow yourself to rise," Patrick coaxed. "Seeing my reflection when you look in the mirror is not the same as seeing me face to face. The closer we can become the stronger our defenses will be." Sam nodded his agreement, then realized Marland could not see the acknowledgment and squeaked out a "Yes." He drifted into the next level, then the next. Slowly, a bearded face appeared before him; Patrick. Sam stared at his host, awestruck. He couldn't move his mouth to speak. His throat became constricted. Feeling rather silly, Beckett continued to stare. "Sit," Patrick said gesturing toward a couch in the center of the white room they now occupied. It looked like the waiting room inside the Quantum Leap Project and yet it had almost a heavenly feel about it. "How--" the time traveler began, but sat down beside the psychic without finishing. Patrick smiled, saying, "It is good to see you, Sam. "Before I begin, do you have any questions you'd like to ask me?" "Yes. Raymond was trying to explain to me how each of my hosts have spiritually agreed to my leaping in and briefly taking over their lives. How is that possible?" "Most people think of the world as strictly linear, but that isn't so. If it were, time travel would not be possible, and you could not change little pieces of history. God is omnipresent, not just in the physical sense, but also in the cosmic sense. He is present at anyplace and anytime. A person can agree to become a host for you, Sam, anytime before or after their corporeal lifetime. Most of them are not consciously aware of this agreement while they are Earthbound, but their consent in many ways prepares them for the experience." "Wow," Sam said, totally flabbergasted. "Have you spoken directly with God?" "In a spiritual sense, everyone has. They just don't remember the experience when they're in this world. Have I spoken directly to God? Yes, but not in a linear sense." "Then how do you understand so much about our cosmic relationships with God?" "Through visions, dreams, and even occasionally through Heaven sightings." "Heaven sightings? Are those like near-death experiences?" "Not necessarily, though some are. I experienced my first Heaven sighting when I was in a coma at the age of thirteen. I think maybe for a couple of minutes I was clinically dead, but God had plans for me. He wanted me to return to my life." "What do you see during these Heaven sightings?" "The world beyond is beautiful, magical. Flowers can bud and bloom in a matter of seconds or a butterfly could take weeks to fly from one flower to the next. Time is irrelevant there. You can relive special moments and skip over others. You can leave your corporeal being behind and float among the stars. Nothing and everything matters. It's home, Sam. Once you remember what home truly is, you never desire anything else as much." "That makes my dream to one day return home to Project Quantum Leap seem so trivial. . . .so childish." "No, Sam, not childish. Your desire to return home, to your time, is important and has its own cosmic purpose. You cannot dismiss physical desires as trivial." Sam nodded his understanding. "We should begin right away with attempting to build trust between us. It is essential that we learn to trust each other. Otherwise, there will be little hope that we will succeed at this mission. I will make the first move in establishing such a bond by sharing some of my beliefs with you. I am a man of very strong ethics. I do not believe that anyone should be forced to participate in anything they don't want to. If you were to tell me this minute that you wanted out, I would not argue. I believe it is your right to choose your own primary mission structure. You have already accepted a responsibility to the Quantum Leap Project. I immensely respect all that you have already accomplished. I will not purposely do anything that will jeopardize your safety or security. Whether we succeed or fail here, the Quantum Leap Project will continue." "I will not turn my back on you or this mission," Beckett promised. "I suspected that about you, but still it had to be your choice. For me, this mission is a small piece of my primary life's mission. My actions here will have repercussions, good or bad, quite possibly both. "There's another thing I must make sure that you understand right away," Patrick continued. "God has the power to force Ben and Karen Simms out of this realm. HE chooses not to force troubled spirits to move on, because it is better for them to first deal with their turmoil before entering HIS kingdom." "That makes perfect sense," Sam replied, "because if God forced them, wouldn't it be like a mind rape?" "Yes. I'm glad you understand. If you have no more questions, I will now begin teaching you techniques that will help you deal with the assignment we face. My life depends on your success. Ben Simms wants to kill Andrew Montgomery and he may attempt to kill you because you are standing in his way. If you can't stop him, The Almighty has promised that you will be able to leap out before the inevitable, and I'll be the one to die." "You would do that for me, a total stranger?" Patrick rubbed against his beard, continuing to smile, not answering Sam's question. "Let's begin the lesson," he said. "There's a PSI technique called flicker that you can use to help ward off Ben Simms." Patrick paused. "You've already experienced it involuntarily when Ben tried to force you over the landing. Someone came to your rescue flashing images into your conscious--that's what flicker is; flashing inside and out of a vision or visions." "Sybil," Sam murmured, recalling the event. "But how can I use this technique on my own?" "Focus on past leaps, my friend." "How can I do that? With my swiss-cheesed brain, I can't even remember a lot of them." "Relax. Let the visions come; let the persona of your hosts envelope you. Even if they don't remember the leap-in at a conscious level, many of them can still help you. Several of your hosts should work as a protective shield, which hopefully Ben will be unable to breach. Indeed, a couple of them will come to you, psychically aware of your dilemma." "What if this doesn't work? What if Ben plows right through it?" "There is no sure way, but you mustn't give up. The best strategy would be to use your PSI abilities in conjunction with rational, deductive reasoning. I don't want you to worry, because if you should fail, I've arranged for you to be leaped out in time." "Arranged?" Patrick nodded, again smiling without offering a verbal answer. "Think about what I've said and consider your options carefully." "There really aren't options, though, are there? I have to learn to do this flicker or one or both of us will die." "Your life is not in danger, my friend," Patrick replied. "I hope you're right. Thank you for all your help, Patrick. There's one other thing I'd like to ask you about. I found a novel in your duffle bag titled Julian's House. I hope you don't mind that I started reading it. Anyway, I was wondering why you had it." "I bought the book only a few days before I read the article about the Sheffields' dilemma. I didn't realize at the time that it would connect somehow with my real life--although I should have. I thought I was just buying a good story for some leisure time. Then I read the article about the Sheffields, and I just knew that I had to respond to it." "I'm beginning to realize just how odd some psychic takes can be." "They can indeed!" "On that note, I think I'm ready to end this session now." "Slowly, let yourself drift out of the Levels, while I begin to drift back toward the Waiting Room." Slowly, Sam brought himself back into the physical body he occupied. He watched as Patrick's image went out of focus and eventually disappeared completely. Soon, he was back in the bed at the Sheffield's house. "How do you feel, Sam?" Al asked. "I'm okay," Sam replied. "In a way, Levels was a lot like meditation," Sam said. "It's different in the sense that I used it to communicate telepathically, but I feel relaxed just as though I'd spent the entire afternoon meditating." He glanced at the clock and was surprised to see that it was after four p.m. He stood and the holographic observer reached out as though he meant to steady his friend--but his arm went right through Beckett, of course. Sam didn't need anyone's help. He actually felt better than he had in quite a long time. "I think I'll go find Ray now," Sam said. "I should talk with him about what just happened." "Ziggy says that he's in the living room with Meg," Al said after fiddling with the handlink. "I'll meet you down there." He popped out. Beckett found Raymond and Meg watching TV, but Raymond muted the volume as soon as he saw the time traveler at the foot of the stairs. "You look like you're feeling rather well," Raymond observed. "I am actually. I had no idea that my overall mental and physical condition could be affected that positively by Levels." "Yes," Meg said, "Levels can be one of the most relaxing and rewarding technique of a psychic. I'm glad you were able to experience those soothing effects." "Sometimes visions or hallucinations will come as a result. But a rested Sam will have a better chance of convincing Ben to stop behaving so irrationally," Raymond said. "Al, on the other hand," the project observer said, "is quite tired at the moment, so if you excuse me, I think I'll go get some shut eye." He popped out. "That's only one of the advantages you gained by this Levels session. You are probably not even aware of some of them." "Oh, really? What are some of the other advantages of Levels?" "Levels can help keep all your psychic activity channeled properly, both during and after a session. Once you've had a session or two, your confidence can also rise. And although Levels is a purely psychic activity, it can also benefit many of your non-psychic activities. In general, Levels help you all the way around." "You're right--I do feel quite rested. I'm glad I decided to give Levels a try." Raymond nodded, without any "I told you so," because that obviously wasn't his style. "There are also residual PSI healing effects that will most likely advance your holistic health as a medical doctor and could help draw you closer to your goal of someday returning home." "Really! I never considered all these possibilities, but they do make sense. I can definitely see now why you and Patrick were eager for me to enter into Levels." "I'm glad you found Levels so rewarding. If you continue to use the ability to displace yourself from your host's body, it could have implications toward eventually getting you home, and this could even be a leap purpose for you. Consider, Sam, that you should continue to practice Levels in future leaps." Raymond paused for a moment to give Sam a chance to let the notion sink in. "It's getting late, so I will see you in the morning." Steele turned and exited the room. Sam laid down and replayed the Levels session over and over through his head. The memory of Patrick's voice was comforting to him. Some hours later, he drifted into sleep. He woke up as the sunlight began creeping through the window and spent several minutes just laying in bed before rising to get dressed. Placing his hand atop Patrick's journal setting on the desk, he closed his eyes and again tried to replay Patrick's every word inside his head. He wanted to stay in tune with Patrick, because he believed the psychic was a source of strength. Sighing, he stepped outside the room. "How are you feeling?" Raymond asked when Sam entered the kitchen. Raymond had made a pot of coffee and without asking, poured Sam a cup. "A bit strange," the time traveler replied, graciously accepting the coffee. "I remember how I felt when I made my first leap. My brain was swiss cheesed during the process, but I'll never forget the sensation of entering my first host. It took me a few leaps to get used to the sensation. This was stranger. I don't think I could ever get used to going into Levels." "Many psychics find going into Levels like second nature." Sam paused in the middle of taking a sip of his coffee. "Well, maybe I'm not cut out to be a psychic after all." He sat down at the table and Steele joined him. "What are you going to do today?" "Well, I've read most of Patrick's journal, so I'm not sure what else to do other than wait for Ben to show up." "I don't think he'll come today." "Why do you say that?" Raymond hesitated. "A premonition." "There seems to be a lot of that going around here." Meg walked in wearing a jogging suit with the sleeves rolled up. Her hair was in a ponytail, but several loose strands mopped her sweaty brow. "It's going to be a fairly nice day," she said. She walked over to the refrigerator and opened the door. "What would you boys like for breakfast? How does Spanish omelets with bacon on the side sound?" "Sounds delicious," Beckett replied. "If you're doing the cooking," Steele added. "I spent my college days working as a short-order cook." She grabbed the eggs, butter, onion, and pepper out of the refrigerator. "You're in for a real treat." Several minutes later, Meg had the food cooked and joined the men at the table. Both Sam and Raymond complimented her on the omelet. Meg's cooking actually reminded Sam of his mother's cooking, making him feel nostalgic. "I'm going to make a run to the grocery story," Raymond said as they were finishing the meal. "Anything either of you'd like me to pick up?" "Whatever you'd like to eat would be fine with me," Sam replied. "Do you mind if I accompany you into town?" Meg asked. "I need to pick up some supplies, and we can save gas if we ride together." "Of course, I don't mind." "Just give me fifteen minutes to shower and change." She stood and started gathering the dishes. "I'll take care of the dishes," Sam offered. "You two go and take care of your errands. It's my turn to stay and babysit this house." While cleaning up the mess in the kitchen, Sam was acutely aware that he was alone. He had thought little of Raymond and Meg leaving when they'd first decided to go shopping, but the moment Raymond pulled his car out of the driveway, Sam had to fight against running after them, yelling at them to come back. He'd faced dangerous situations before, but somehow being left in a house when the only other occupants were ghosts, frightened Sam more than his swiss- cheesed mind allowed him to remember he'd ever been. After he'd finished with the kitchen work, Sam removed his wallet from his pants pocket and pulled out the card Charles Sheffield had given him. Walking over to the phone he picked up the receiver and dialed the number. "Hello," Charles answered on the second ring. "Hello, Mr. Sheffield. This is Patrick Marland," Sam replied. "I still have a ways to go before solving our little problem here, but I thought I better update you on the situation." "Well, don't keep me in suspense." "We believe that Ben Simms is being influenced by demonic forces." Al made his appearance directly behind Beckett and said, "Sam, Simms suffered from post-traumatic syndrome after he came home from Vietnam. Karen tried to talk him into seeing a psychiatrist, but he refused to see any shrink." Talking at the same time as the hologram he obviously couldn't hear, Charles said, "So? Why would demons be so interested in forcing these ghosts to remain in my home? I thought if demons took your soul, they forced you to live eternally in Hell." "We don't know the answer to that yet. What we do know is how the demons were able to so easily influence Ben Simms. Ben - spent time over in Vietnam," Sam replied. "He had a lot of problems when he returned home, including the possibility that his wife had an affair. She says she didn't have an affair, and I know she didn't." "How would you know? Are you having long conversations with her that you haven't told me about?" "No," Sam said, realizing his blunder. Even if Charles believed Patrick was psychic that didn't mean he would accept the reality of time travel. "It's just a hunch. I think if I convince Ben that she didn't have an affair, he'll leave." "I don't care how you get rid of them. Just get them out of my house!" Sam started to reply, but before he could he heard the distinct click of Sheffield hanging up. He turned toward Al, hoping the older man could advise him. Al, in turn, sought the advice from Ziggy. "Ziggy says that there's an 11.7 percent chance you can tell Ben Simms that you didn't have an affair with his wife and that he'll believe you. He also says there's an 86.9 percent chance that someone will try to kill you again." After a moment of silence, the time traveler asked, "What should I do?" Al consulted Ziggy. "Ziggy says your best odds are in trying to contact Ben Simms." "My best odds are 11.7?" "Well, at the moment, but Ziggy's working on formulating another plan." Suddenly the lights on the handlink began flashing rapidly and Calavicci peered down at it. "Ziggy says that you should concentrate on past leaps; that you could find security against Ben through them." "Patrick told me the same thing, but how? And why?" Again, Al returned to Ziggy for help, punching a couple buttons and smacking the handlink once. "I don't know. I guess there's strength in numbers. Ziggy says that, though most of them aren't consciously aware of your situation, several people you've leaped into want to help you. Sybil is predominately in the air. Ziggy says her soothing vibes can be felt like water in a whirlpool." "Did Ziggy really come up with that or are those your words?" "Ziggy does tend to get a little too analytical at times." Al paused. "Anyway, it's like they're sending their subconscious, or spirits, or something your way. If you concentrate on them; let their persona surround you like a protective shield." "Then I should try to make contact with one of these people before I try to get a hold of Ben Simms?" The hologram peered into the handlink. "Your odds of warding off a blow are going up, Sam." "But who do I call?" Al knew that his friend didn't mean by phone. "Ziggy's not sure," he replied, lowering the handlink. "I think we better ask Patrick about that." Sam spent the hours that followed thinking through his strategy and rereading the journal entries. He broke from the routine only long enough to eat dinner. Meg and Ray arrived just as he was finishing the meal and joined him. Excusing himself, he went to bed early in hopes that his dreams would have better advice to offer. * * * Al entered the room to find Patrick leafing through a photo album. Walking up to the psychic, Al discovered that it contained pictures of the party the crew had thrown for Sam right before he took his first leap. "I thought it would help me feel closer to him," Patrick said. "I hope you don't mind." "Not at all," Al replied. "Gooshi said you wanted to see me." Patrick closed the book before answering. "Ziggy's wrong," he said. "You do not want Sam to try to contact Ben Simms. That would most likely draw the attention of the demons influencing him." "How did you know--" Al began, but stopped himself as he realized the answer. "I'll admit Ziggy can be wrong sometimes." "Not unlike we humans." He took a sip of his coffee. "I'd like to enter into Levels with Sam again. I'm confident that Sam understood everything yesterday, but something is nagging at me. I have this feeling--almost like a desire--to repeat the process. I don't know if it's pertinent that we do this, but I don't want to take any chances." "I'll get the message to Sam. When do you think we should plan this?" "Tomorrow, certainly no later than the next day. Ask him to compile a list of questions he wants to ask me. You know Sam better than I. Do you think he'll agree to this?" "Well--I don't think there's any danger in it, "Al said slowly. "Is there?" "No. Levels are perfectly safe." "Then he'll do anything that might help solve our problem."