Date: Tue, 1 Oct 1996 13:23:10 -0600 (MDT) From: "Katherine R. Freymuth" Subject: Theresa -Chapter 25 Message-ID: Chapter 25 Regrets The viewphone chirped several times before Theresa was able to answer it. She had been working on a painting she had started earlier after Al had left for the complex. Right now, she quickly sat before the viewscreen but pressed the receiving button. "Hello," she said quickly, still mentally hurried. "Miss Brookner, I'm glad I was able to get a hold of you," an attractive lady replied. "My name is Elizabeth Covington. Mr. Robert Stane suggested that I might want to talk to you." Elizabeth Covington gave off an air of a woman who saw life as a series of adventures. Her dress was elegant but simple as was everything about her. Theresa remembered Robert Stane. He was one of the people who interviewed her for a job opening. She had found him kind and courteous. However, it was obvious from the end of the interview that, although he considered Theresa talented, he was looking for someone with more experience. "Talk to me about what?" Theresa asked, looking curious. "Why, a job opening, of course," Elizabeth Covington smiled at her. Theresa hesitated a moment, a bit caught by surprise. "Miss Covington..." "Elizabeth," she corrected. Theresa nodded briefly to let her know that she understood the correction. "Mr. Stane indicated that he wasn't interested in hiring me." "Miss Brookner, I'm not hiring for Robert. I'm hiring for myself," Elizabeth told her. "Are you interested?" Theresa hesitated again. "I... I really don't know what to say. Why would you want to hire me?" "After he didn't?" Elizabeth finished the question. "Richard wants professionals. That's his field. I, on the other hand, want artists. Real artists, not famous show-offs. I've seen your work and I want to meet with you to discuss employment arrangements." "Okay," Theresa answered without hesitation. "When would you like to meet?" "How about I come to Albuquerque tomorrow and we can discuss it over lunch?" Theresa's eyes widened. "You're coming to me?" Elizabeth laughed. "Sure. What's wrong with that?" "Well, it's just a little unexpected," Theresa told her. "That's what you can expect of me. So, how about it?" Theresa nodded. "Sure," she told her. "Excellent," Elizabeth replied. They arranged their luncheon meeting. *********************** Al hadn't left the Imaging Chamber and with good reason. Sam was much too busy reassuring Suzanne than to take time to reassure himself. When he finally did get the chance after Chris was finally released from the hospital, he was too tired to waste energy reassuring himself. Chris and Suzanne didn't leave the hospital, however. They stayed by Sam as he sat in the lounge, holding an untouched cup of coffee that had gone cold. "She'll be okay, Jeff," Chris told him, looking at his lowered head. "She will." "Will she?" Sam half muttered. But the question wasn't directed at Chris. It was directed at Al, who stood beside him in support. Al looked at Sam with understanding. "We don't know, Sam. We just don't know." Sam glared at Al for an answer. "Hey," Al told him, "I'm not about to lie to you. It wouldn't be fair to any of us. Ziggy just doesn't know." He sighed. "Dear lord, please let her live." "Hey," Chris broke in. "You okay, Jeff?" Sam turned to Chris. He had obviously been worried about Sam's "staring out into space", as it looked to him. "I'm fine," Sam answered. He answer was quiet. Chris nodded with understanding. There were a few minutes of silence before anyone spoke. "I can't stand this!" Suzanne exclaimed, breaking the gloomy silence. She rose quickly and started to pace. "All this waiting! Not knowing for sure if she's going to be all right! I don't think I can take much more of this!" She was becoming white with frustration. Chris rose and went to her. He held her gently in his arms while she placed her head against his chest. "I don't know why I'm acting this way," she said after a moment. "Maybe it's just my being pregnant." "Pregnant?" Chris questioned, gently pushing her away so that he could look into her eyes. Suzanne was silent for a moment. "I was going to tell you at the right moment." "Why didn't you tell me earlier? How far along are you?" Chris asked, a little upset for not having known before. "About nine weeks," Suzanne answered meekly. Chris understood the meaning behind the meekness. "You knew about this before the wedding. Why didn't you tell me?" There were a few seconds of silence as Suzanne thought about Chris's words. "I guess I didn't want to embarrass you." Chris laughed slightly. "Embarrass me?" Suzanne looked at him knowingly. "I know important the image of a dutiful wife is to a Muslim." Chris's smile widened. "Is that all?" he asked. "I though that was enough of a reason," Suzanne told him. "Chris, I love you. And I don't want anything... _anything_ ... to hurt you." Chris hugged her. "Honey, you could never embarrass me or hurt me by carrying our child." Sam had been sitting quietly as he and Al watched Chris and Suzanne's conversation. Sam smiled, pleased that Suzanne's pregnancy was finally known to Chris. "Why don't you two go home?" he told them. "It's getting late." Suzanne looked at him with surprise. "Jeff, we couldn't possibly..." "Go on," Sam told her. "I'll call you when I hear something." Suzanne went over to Sam and kissed him. "If you won't let us be here in person, at least let us be here in spirit." "Thanks, Suzanne," Sam told her, touching her hand gently. Chris and Suzanne left, Chris giving Sam a reassuring touch on the shoulder as they left. "What happens to her, Al?" Sam asked, looking towards the room in which doctors worked on Jennifer. Al followed the gaze, understanding Sam. "Like I said, we don't know." There was silence between them for several moments. "I'm responsible," Sam finally said. "What?" Al turned to him. "All of this would never have happened if it weren't for me." Al sighed. "Sam, you can't blame yourself for this. You did the right thing. I can see that now. You took the best scenario of a lot of bad ones." "The accident would never have happened and Jennifer would be okay if it weren't for me," Sam told him firmly. "Listen to yourself, Sam," Al told him, strength in his eyes. "We both know that, in the original history, everyone died because of that accident, whether directly or indirectly." "Yes, but I caused _this_ accident!" Sam insisted. "It was because of what I did that Jennifer is in that operating room!" Al paused a moment. "Actually, it was Richard Oster that caused the accident." "Come on, Al!" Sam bellowed. "Oster may have caused an accident on June 1, 1995, but he didn't cause Jennifer to be in there!" "You're right," Al told him. "He didn't." "Finally, you're making sense." "Chris did." Quiet filled the corridor, permeating every corner. Sam looked at Al in astonishment. "What?" Sam finally asked in a near whisper. "Chris caused the accident." Sam stood up slowly. He looked at Al in the eyes with disgust. "How can you possibly blame Chris for the accident? It wasn't anymore his fault than it was Suzanne's or Jennifer's!" "It was their fault too." Sam glared at Al. "Get out of here," he said in a low voice. "I don't even want to know you're around." The two stared at each other, neither moving nor looking away. "Did you hear me?" Sam finally said. "I heard you," Al answered. "I was just making a point." "What point?" "That, if the accident was your fault, then it was everyone else's!" Al exclaimed, gesturing emphatically. "It was your fault because you failed to influence Chris not to go! It's Chris's fault because he was the one driving and he didn't believe you! It's Suzanne's and Jennifer's faults because they didn't believe you! The same with Jeff's friends! It's my fault because I let you do that crazy charade and it's Ziggy's because she didn't give us a perfect solution!" "What are you saying, Al?" Sam demanded. Al looked at Sam firmly in the eyes. The look was knee-shaking to the best of the Navy and Sam found it difficult to not shake himself. "What I am saying, Dr. Samuel Beckett, is we are all human and sometimes certain things happen that are beyond our control. Yes, you might have been able to prevent you four from being in an accident but you would have probably had to keep them in the apartment at gun point." Sam smiled involuntarily at the thought. "As you can see, that's not a very viable solution," Al continued. "Sam, you did the best you could possibly do given the circumstances. I can honestly say that no one else in the world could have done better." There was a pause. "Except perhaps me." Sam couldn't help but laugh at that. He exhaled with a smile. "Thanks, Al." "Hey, what are friends for?" "So, what about Jennifer?" Sam asked obviously still deeply concerned. At that moment, a squeak came from Al's pocket. Al took out the handlink and looked at it. "Oh, no," Al muttered softly. He looked up at Sam, deep sadness in his eyes. "Jennifer?" Sam whispered. Al looked away from him, unable to keep his eyes on Sam's. "Mr. Sterling?" a male voice came from behind. Sam turned around to see a man dressed in a white lab coat. He, like Al, also had a sad look in his eyes. At that moment, Sam mourned. *************************** Al stopped before the Waiting Room door, not wanting to go in. He knew what he had to do and he knew it was absolutely necessary but that didn't help the empty feeling in his gut. It was the kind of feeling that he would have tried to fill with liquor a long time ago. Now, he had only one way to drown out the feeling. He had to face it head-on. But still, he didn't move. He stood where he was, looking at the door. "What's wrong?" a voice said from behind. "What makes you think there's anything wrong?" Al asked without turning around. "Well," Verbina said as she walked up and stood at his side, "normally Naval admirals don't stand in front of a door with a foreboding look on their face without something being wrong." Al gave a humorless smile. "Have you made a case study of Naval admirals?" "Why not?" Verbina grinned. "I've had access to a perfect specimen for the past four years." Al didn't smile. Verbina looked at him with concern. Her grin faded. "What happened?" Al took a deep breath. "Jennifer Sterling just died from severe hemorrhaging caused by the accident." Verbina's head dropped in sympathy. "And you're about to go tell Jeff." Al nodded his head. Verbina sighed. "It must be hard always being the one to tell others about a death in the family." "I suppose," Al replied, still keeping his eyes on the door. Verbina nodded slightly with understanding. "There's more to it than just that, isn't there." Al turned away from the Waiting Room door. "I'd say there is," he told Verbina before walking towards Ziggy. Verbina looked towards Al. "What is it, Al? Don't run from the issue." Al stopped and turned to her. "You think I'm running away?" She went towards him. "Al, you've been under a lot of pressure for the past few weeks. You've been dividing your attention between Sam, the Project, and Theresa and now you're carrying an extra burden which you need to get off your shoulders or you'll crack." Al glared at her. "Al Calavicci doesn't crack under pressure." "No, but he can crack under his own feelings of guilt," she replied. "You feel guilty about Jennifer's death." Al hesitated. "If feeling you could have done something to prevent her death is feeling guilt then, hell yes, I feel guilty." "So you really don't believe what you told Sam in the Imaging Chamber," Verbina concluded. "You were listening to my side of the conversation?" Al said more than asked. "You had been in there for a long time and when Ziggy told me about the accident I became concerned." "That's an invasion of privacy," Al told her firmly. "You're dodging the subject," Verbina retaliated. "I was doing my job in there," Al returned to the subject. "Is it your job to disillusion Sam?" Al paused, confused. "What the hell are you talking about?" "I'm talking about you lying to Sam about the accident not being his fault." Al glared at Verbina in anger. "The accident _wasn't_ Sam's fault." "Oh," Verbina commented. "I see. So, that pep talk you gave Sam doesn't apply to you." Al was about to speak but he stopped. He was about to defend Sam's position involving the accident when he realized he had fallen for one of Verbina's induced arguments. He thought for a moment. "Verbina, I'm not taking the blame on myself. I know that none of us could have prevented the accident. We did what we had to do to minimize the damage of that accident." "Even so, as a good leader, you _are_ taking on the blame," Verbina told him. Al was quiet, thinking about her words. "Are you saying I'm being dishonest with myself?" "Bingo," Verbina answered. "How?" he asked, looking at her. "You tell me. How is this time different from others?" Al hesitated. "I don't know. I've never had to tell a guest about a loved one's death." "You're afraid of how Jeff will take it," Verbina surmised. Al nodded. "Yeah, I'm afraid. I'm about to tell someone who doesn't exactly trust us that his wife died on the operating table due to an accident that didn't happen in the original history." Verbina nodded. "Everyone feels like the proverbial bearer of bad news every once in a while. But you've done it many times before and this is no different than any other time." Al didn't respond. He looked at Verbina, obviously unsure. "Al," she told him, touching his hand. "I can't think of a better person to handle such a delicate situation." Al gave her a slight smile. "I bet you say that to all the Naval admirals." ************************* "What?" Jeff said in a slight whisper. Al closed his eyes. He knew the kid in front of him was devastated. "I'm sorry," he told him softly, shaking his head slightly. Jeff shook his head. "No! It can't be! You're lying! You're lying!" Sympathy filled Al's heart. He went over to Jeff and held him. "You're lying," Jeff muttered one last time before completely breaking, becoming as helpless as a lost child in Al's arms. Al realized as he held Jeff just how important Jennifer had been to the poor man. Al hoped Jeff didn't get Sam's memory of the accident. He didn't want Jeff to have those kind of memories. Al remained in the Waiting Room several hours as he comforted Jeff in his intense grief. -------------------------------------- Chapter 26 next. 3 chapters to go. Kat