"Leaping of the Shrew"



Who is this, the Miss Wet Evening Gown contest winner?
-- Al, "Leaping of the Shrew"

We're making preparations for Tina's birthday party and she wants me to pop out of the cake. You'll never believe what she wants me to not wear.
-- Al, "Leaping of the Shrew"

Sunken treasure!
-- Sam, throwing the silver off the life raft, "Leaping of the Shrew"

You are not going fishing with my Grandmama's veil.
I won't tell her if you won't.
-- Vanessa and Sam, "Leaping of the Shrew"

Six kids -- you guys are going to be busy bunnies!
-- Al, "Sea Shrew" ...er... "Leaping of the Bride" ...er...

I hate to miss the exciting conclusion, but I've gotta go give Tina her birthday present, and it's a big one.
-- Al, "Leaping of the Shrew"

You know, you never talked to yourself when we were on the ship!
-- Vanessa, overhearing Sam talking to Al, "Leaping of the Shrew"

This is Vanessa Foster, of the Philadelphia Fosters, she's got more dough than Pillsbury.
-- Al, "Leaping of the Shrew"

You must be doing something wrong here, your odds of survival are going down faster than I can read.
-- Al, "Leaping of the Shrew"

First I ripped off all your clothes, then I pulled out my bouzouki and played wild peasant songs while I danced naked around the raft."
-- Sam, "Leaping of the Shrew"

Bon Voyage.  I've gotta go jump up out of a cake.
-- Al, "Leaping of the Shrew"

Trust me, I have no interest in your underwear.
I knew it, the sun is getting to his mind.
-- Sam and Al, about the contents of Vanessa's trunk, "Leaping of the Shrew"

~Sam is going through Vanessa’s trunk. He finds some underwear, she tells him to get his "paws" out of there.

Sam: Trust me. I have no interest in your underwear.

Al: I knew it. The sun is getting to his mind.


~Al: We're making preparations for Tina's birthday party and she wants me to pop out of the cake. You'll never believe what she wants me not to wear.


~Vanessa tells Sam she has "food" in the trunk.

Sam: Gum?!? 100’s of sticks of gum? You brought 100’s of sticks of gum along?!?

Vanessa: Yeah, I was going to quit smoking.


~Vanessa: So hungry.

Sam: I figure we got about 188 more sticks of gum.


~Sam: True love is the only love worth having.


~Vanessa and Sam are sleeping in the raft. She wakes up first.

Vanessa: Ahhhhhh!

Sam: What. What?

Vanessa: How dare you.

Sam: How dare I what?

Vanessa: Use your shoulder as my pillow.

Sam: Your pillow?

Vanessa: What else did you do?

Sam: Well, ya know. First I ripped off all your clothes. Then I pulled out my bazookie and played wild peasant songs while I danced naked around the raft.

Vanessa: Well you just keep your bazookie to yourself.


~Vanessa offers Sam some of her cooked clams.

Sam: I don’t like clams.

Vanessa: And you love grapes and toothpaste?


~Al and Sam are talking in the jungle.

Al: Hey listen. There’s no way she would get this bad under your skin unless you had feelings for her.

Sam: The only feelings I have for her are homicidal. "Leaping of the Shrew"