"Shock Theater"
A cute...A cute...oh I hope it's a nurse...
-- Al, "Shock Theater"

Hi, Al.
-- Tibby, "Shock Theater"

The guy in the red jacket!
You can see me?
Sure! Nice jacket!
-- Tibby and Al, "Shock Theatre"

This is great, I'm tuned in to little kids, I'm tuned in to animals, and now the mentally absent.  Why not blondes?
-- Al, "Shock Theater"

Keep your hands outta me!
I gotta check my medication.
-- Al and Tibby, "Shock Theater"

Oh Boy!
-- Sam and Al, at the end of "Shock Theater"

You're a looney toon in a big white room
And I'm a hologram from the future
And I'm moving fast, back into the past
And I've got to say I'm pleased to meet ya'!
Because you're my man and I've got some thing that you can understand
You've got the power
To write and read, to say that's guaranteed.
I'm gonna give you what you need!
-- Rapmaster Al, "Shock Theater"

So I'm a good guy?
Yeah.  You're a *damned* good guy!
-- Sam and Al, "Shock Theater"

Al...don't leave me...
I won't, Sam.
-- Sam and Al, "Shock Theater"

This here is the sub-atomic structure of a quark --  What the hell is a quark?
-- "Jesse", "Shock Theater"

Don't tell Gloria.
-- "Samantha", "Shock Theater"

Oh great Sam, now they think you're Sybil!
-- Al, "Shock Theater"

The air is filthy and the cars are still on the ground, but we're working on it.
-- Al, "Shock Theater"

I'm Al. I'm your buddy. I gave you your first break and you're the only person that believed in me when I gave up believing in myself. You brought me on this Project.
-- Al, "Shock Theater”